Explanation Complications
The hardest part of having a motocross injury--save for the time off from riding and the oft-agonizing pain--is telling non-motocross people about your injury. I've said this before, but I'll say it again because it is so true: when you tell most people that you hurt your arm/leg/wrist/whatever on a dirt bike, they think you are--how can I put this delicately?--an incredible moron.
I work at a library, and with every injury of mine I've had to tell the story to people who only vaguely know what motocross racing is. This is difficult because the storyline of my life seems so incomprehensible to them: I go out every weekend to risk my body for virtually no money and, to the average person, not a sliver of notoriety.
Don't get me wrong: I like the people I work with, and they are not stupid. They just can't relate to throttling a dirt bike around a track for fun. To them it is nothing but danger and expense, and my affection for it puts me in a category just north of psychotic.
Need evidence? Here are excerpts from conversations from my first few days at work. Some of them are with colleagues; others are with library patrons. All felt slightly demeaning:
Person: So you giving up that motorcycle now? (No "hello" required, apparently.)
Me: Um...no. I might be more careful, but I'll definitely still ride.
Person: You're going to leave a widow and two daughters behind with that thing.
Me: Well...um...yeah. (That wasn't a little heavy or anything.) Thanks for the warning, I guess.
****
Person: Tell me you're retired now. (Again no "hello"?)
Me: No, no retirement. In fact, I wasn't even racing when I crashed. I was just practicing.
Person: Well, it's lucky that your wife still lets you do that stuff.
Me: Yes. Lucky. (thinking to myself: is lucky the right word? My wife and I wouldn't have made it a week without her understanding about motocross. Maybe important is more like it.)
****
Person: (Sees me on crutches and makes insanely annoying imitation of a dirt bike that goes on way, way too long.)
Me: (Smiles uncomfortably and inches away to pretend to find something else to do.)
****
So this is my life at the moment. What drives me crazy about all of this is that everyone assumes that I've learned some grand lesson that they knew all along: dirt bikes are dangerous.
But here's the thing: I already knew that. I have raced them for 21 years, people. I'm aware of their perils, and I've come to terms with them. I understand it's not always easy to realize that there are things in life worth risking injury for, but they do exist. I promise.
If you can't understand this, please just fake it. I'll appreciate it.
